AH :(

gue benci banget sumpaaaaaaaaaaah. tau ga sih gua sekarang jadi berubah. bangun tidur udah cek hape ada sms dr dia apa ga. langsung cek twitter nya. sedangkan dia sendiri enak enakan sama temen-temennya. sms gua gadibales. anjir bgt taugak sih. mental bocah!

oh seriously he's suck

you know right about him. he's now not my friend anymore. he's now my boyfriend. but it's suck! he doesn't make me happy like when i'm being his friend. it's a little bit annoying. he bugging me. oh fyi, he made my last midtest's score was lower than before. it's very very making me frustated. you know, i was always thinking about him and one girl. haha they're fucking perfect. you know she's funny, he's funny, but only to his friend. isn't it very very suck? i'm his girlfriend but he often making me happy, smile, or laugh. he was always make me sad. i crying all night long. don't eat much because i don't want to. seriously it's very annoy me. i regret to be his girlfriend if he doesn't made me happy, laugh, or out of this stress! fuck you guys. i hate you guys. very hate you.

i don't know what should i do to you again. i have doing my best. but you never realize. i was changed. but now i just turn back to my old me. you, as my boyfriend, didn't made me better. but badder. hate you. hate this. hate her. fuck you guys. seriously fuck you.

FUCK

AAAAAAAAA mau belajar, ngerjain tugas, pengen fokus. maunya sih di support sama PACAR. tapi orangnya terlalu sibuk sama urusannya

udah berapa pelajaran yang gua korbanin? gua cape diem terus. gua kecewa garagara ini udah menyangkut nilai.

buangbuang waktu, air mata, buat apa coba? orangnya aja malah ketawa ketawa isengin cewe lain dan temantemannya. siapatuh?

tapi kalau diblog ya buat apa? males apus deh. itu justru bikin gua inget kalau gua gaboleh ngebiarin nilai gua turun

kalau gua se brengsek dulu, pasti bakal lebih mudah. tapi masalahnya gua udah stuck suka sama seorang cowo.dan sumpah ini yg paling kompleks

lebih perhatian sama temen temen dibanding pacarnya. siapatuh?

kalau ditegur, ujungnya gua yang bakal dimarahin. siapatuh?

kurang menghargai apa coba? dia baik banget sama temen"nya. seru. temen"nya dibikin ketawa tiap hari. gua dibikin nangis tiap hari.siapatuh?

please ya tweet gua ini gak menuju ke satu orang ko. ga subjektif. ini objektif. fakta. apa adanya.

gua kira dengan ngebaikin orang itu, semua bakal balik lagi kaya dulu. nyatanya? malah MENEL sama cewe laen. dih. bilang gua menel padahal?

kemana sih cewe yang dulu gua kenal ceria banget? kaya gaada beban hidup? cuekan, fokus sama pelajaran? udah terkubur sama bullshit itu?

lu berdua ya, ngeganggu banget sumpaaah

a big GTFO for the one who made my score lower!

btw tentang gue, gue udah membiarkan 2 orang gapenting ini bikin nilai gua turun

kelebihan lu dan dia beda. mungkin dia di cantik dan skill. siapatau lu punya sesuatu yang lebih? cheer up~

kalau lu jelek dan cewe itu cantik, terus kenapa? apa dengan lu jelek lu mati? kan engga. setiap orang punya kelebihan masing masing

gua lebih suka lu yang dulu loh. cewe yang kuat, yang buat nangisin cowo aja butuh waktu lama. ga kaya sekarang. lemah. lembek. payah

bilang apa gue ke nyokap nilai turun gini? 'MAMA AKU PACARAN DAN SAKIT HATI' gitu? lu harus tau ne nilai gua turun drastis

...

WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I HATE THAT GIRL. SO ANNOYING. THAT SHIT THAT ASSHOLE THA GIRL x ldgfkluhdsrbliyuyhsdnrlhs FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK AAARGH THAT GIRL SO ANNOYING

new friends?

how you have been? ah i was off for a while. i'm missing my blog. well, now i'm on high school. not a jhs's student anymore. i'm so happy of it. but...

my friend, my old friend is different. she's always hang out with her new friend. i know they're beautiful but heeey, it's suck you know? when i greet her, she doesn't recognize. he was so close to me. but now? we're just like a new friend, haven't meet before. she was my bestfriend. i did everything to her. just to make her happy. but now? does she remember? no.

i hate it. she doens't remember when i remake her relationship with her boy. then what's she do for the favor??? NO. she's left me. ah i hate her

Saying " It's ok " but secretly knowing its killing you inside

hey, it's my another sucks day story. it's still about the performance. allright actually it's a drama so just call it drama. not 'the performance' nor 'present of my class' because that's too long. ok i just wanna tell how was it going today. well it ain't going good. it's going WORST. you know? i was always be a trash on this thingy. drama. it ain't an opera or something that invited a majesty queen nor king. just some of parents, formers, and teachers. but i don't know why i wanna act too. even i knew that i'll just messed it up. but what's wrong if i just wanna try? people won't let me i guess. actually my bored are begin when it's being fickle. for the first time they said that all of the class member will appear. but the next time they said it's all changed. not at all. then they said everyone who wanna be a property part, said yes. buut when i wanna said yes, someone of them asked me with unfriendly.

me: hey, so what should i do? should i...

girl: well, if you're not serious like this, you better don't working at all

me: ...

girl: so, you'll join or not?

me: i'm just... but... i'll be so useless right?

girl: if you won't just say

me: ok then i won't

girl: is it ok?

me: yes

"Saying " It's ok " but secretly knowing its killing you inside"

i knew it's really hard for me to say 'it's ok' but i swear its HURT!!!! ACTUALLY I WANT! BUT THEY WON'T HEAR ME THEY WON'T LET ME! i knew it. gah. i can see it from they eyes. it's hard to be treated like this. i was mistreated. they don't understand me. underestimated. they're happy with my own suffer. thanks guys. thanks for making me hate of myself. making me hate of why were i born.

THANKS

what should i do?

hey it's me again. i was posting 2 times today, wasn't me? it's because today i'm feelin bad. just so you know, it's my bad day story blog. and my normal day is on the another blog. and with indonesian language so it's hard to understand. this post i'm gonna tell you about my feeling this night. as ussually, i felt bad. it's because one of my friend said something i hate. let's call her Y. as what you've knew, i ever envied my friends right? and about the class performance plan? yeah it's connected. about that both. aaaand, the queen bee. it's happened recently. this evening, i sent Y a chat. i'm just asking her something. i knew it's annoying. i hate this. i'm just upset because why-are-they-so-meanie-to-me. that's all. the chat was 'hey, are you playing that game?' 'is there a meet and share today?' 'are you happy today?' 'are you laughing a lot today?' but it's actually mean 'are you playing game? i hate you because you're not waiting for me!' 'i knew there's a meet and share today. but YOU DIDN'T TOLD ME EITHER!' 'are you happy today? because i was so cruel and sad today!' 'are you laughing a lot today? because I'M CRYING A LOT INSIDE!' i was hurted because of them. it's hurt but they wouldn't feel it. i was backstabbed. that traitor. they're not my bestfriend because they didn't notice me. even sometime yes. and the thing that made me cruel this time is i sent a chat to her 'hey, so you won't reply huh? :)' then she sent me a PM.

'oh hi. sorry i wasn't noticed it's you. and umm yeah tommorow we will had a training. but queen bee-she said the real name- shoulda came tommorow because she's responsible of our training'

is my question asking about that? am i asking about that queen bee? did i? am i? i don't even ask her about that queen bee! doesn't she knew that is annoying me. that's hesitating. i was like 'what do you want? show me that you and her are the important girl that would performing on the stage? and me, just a ...' nevermind. the another thing is, peoples always blame me. but i can't scream to their faces and said 'STOP BLAME ME!' that's too hard for me. i knew about Y's dreamingboy. and i knew the truth.

2 days ago, she told me that 'the boy' made a space with her because another boy are waiting for her so 'the boy' is just surrender. but THAT'S DEFINITELY WRONG! she just too confidence. then i told her 'believe me, stop do that!' i said that because i can't let her being that slut again. i won't. but you know what? the wise one blame me. but before, she said that she wanna told Y about it. then i was blamed just because of that words? is it bad to make your friend better? she's suffer! 'the boy' is definitely love the other girl. she just won't realize. now they all were blame me. isn't that suck? i can crying all night. girls, please realize when he doesn't like you again. don't be too confidence. you shoulda know how the difference of the boy that still love you or not. i knew the truth but she won't hear me. then just wait the time that she'll crying. it's just about time trick. then i'm gonna waiting for the day. ah guys, i was so tired of being here. thanks for reading :)